Sunday, October 28, 2007

from arms to bassenette

My little one is nearly 6 weeks old already. I still can't believe how time has been flying now. Well last night the husband decided that we should try and get her to sleep in her bassenette. For those of you who didn't know, she has been sleep in my arms either on the couch or in bed, and last night was the first night I was not there to comfort her. Before becoming a mom I would have thought "well it's about time" or " must have been nice to not have her with you", but to be honest I missed her. It was so hard on me. Did I have a good night sleep.. well actually I did and didn't. I found myself awake listening to her breath, and every sound she made I was up listening. When it was time to get up and feed her I did so, then placed her back in her bed, as much as I wanted to bring her to bed with me, I had to be consistant. KILLED ME. My husband doesn't completely understand, and that's ok.

As I write this, I am on my own. Husband took Adele so I can have some time to myself. Yet I miss her. Again pre-mommyhood "great time to yourself". I find I feel like I am running around with my head cut off. What do I do??? There are so many things that I can get done, but right now all I want is to sit and watch a movie, and cuddle my little one.

Wow how becoming a mom can really change you. I never thought I would see myself as a mom. Or be able to love somethign SO much, that you heart just feels empty when they are gone.