Running and tattoos

Well it's been a couple of months since my last entry, and many things have happened.
1. Addy and I have moved into a very lovely new home. It's home now, and I love it.
2. I did it.. I did my half marathon in 2 hours and 34 minutes. I was thrilled to reach that finish line. I ran for me, for my daughter and for my father. There was a moment when I was running I reached the ocean, the sun was shining and for that moment I closed my eyes and felt the ray of sunshine warm my face. And for a moment, I thought I could feel my dad beside me.
On that note, I am really missing my father right now, fall was his favorite season. Watching the leaves fall really makes the memories come flooding in.
3. I finally have a new tattoo. It's my homage to Addy. I love it. It's so different but it's me.

So nothing to really report today. Addy and I went to visit my cousin in Shawnigan lake. It's always a great visit. No pictures today. Addy was so good today. Mommy on the other hand was exhausted.

Dragon Bites

Today was a lot cooler then yesterday. The weather has been hot hot hot. Addy and I went to watch the dragon boat races that were happening in the inner harbor. It was really exciting to watch. The paddlers were working so hard, and the races were really close!!! But they were behind schedule, about half an hour.
I enjoyed watching also the color that was surrounding me. One thing that struck me was the lanterns, it was a fundraiser to raise money for the cancer association. You purchase a lantern and place a special message on it. There were so many lanterns, that I just started to cry. I miss my father.

Bike 1 Gen 0

This morning I decided I was going to try out my bike shoes! Before heading out on the road I tested my right foot of popping in and out of the pedels with the cleats of the shoes.. alll good
So off I went 6am biking to Tilicum mall, thinking I will have a coffee. I was in heaven!! Then I tried to unclip my LEFT shoe, and NOOOO go, I'm getting closer to the coffee shop, and still it's not coming off the peddle. Panic kicks in.. and then I'm reefing on my shoe.. but then the bike had stopped and down I went!!! It was like slow motion...so here I am on the cement, ego bruised, and still can't get my shoe to release from the clip. Had to take my shoe off, and standing there with one shoe on, and sock on the other! And embarassed as hell. Finally the shoe came off, and it turned out the cleat had rotated... so lucky for me the manager of Starbucks was a cyclist and he had an alan key. So with an Americano in one hand and tools in the other I fixed my shoes, and looked at what damaged might have been done to the bike!
And then enjoyed the ride home, laughing of my adventure. I am more bruised now then I have been in a long time, and this is all in one week!.

A day at the park

Today was a great day for Addy and I. We went to the park with Andrea, her daughter Kara, and her two sons Justin and Taylor. We wanted Addy to get used to everyone as Andrea will be watching Addy when I head back to work. I really don't think I have NOTHING to worry about as Addy took to Andrea NO problem. It was a wonderful time to feed the ducks and take pictures of the girls. Andrea took this picture of Addy and me. T here really aren't alot of pictures of her and I, and I wish I had more.

Well my inspiration today is my little one Addy. I mean what can you say she is my inspiration for everything these days. Her smile brings joy to everyone around her. She is very special and is very loved! I can't believe she will be one in a month. Where did the time go? I'm also back to work soon. I am going to miss her so much.

plants in the yard

I was trying to figure out what todays pictures will be until I looked outside and thought well I have some beauty in the yard. So here are some flowers, and grapes... YES I have grapes in the yard.
It's a hot day, and the house is staying cool. Today I helped Penny pick up her new bike. I'm very excited to get my chariot. I really don't have to much to say today. I'm a little tired and I think mentally drained.

People and Feet

Well I'm taking a bit of a journey and following the footsteps of a dear friend of mine Julie. She has been blogging everyday and showing pictures that she has taken (see links section). So today while listening to our PM talk, I looked around and took pictures of the crowds, and feet. Yes your heard me feet. I just thought wow, look at all the different pairs of shoes. So my picture of the day is feet.

Shyte and Snow birds

Well it's been awhile since i have written here. Alot is going on.

First of all this morning was a HUGE surprise. Walking into Addy's room, there was an odor of shyte (no other way to put it) not thinking much of it, until we walked up to her crib!!! It was everywhere. Bed sheets, clothes, hands hair, face, sheets, bed bumper, shall I go on!!! So my little angel had a morning bath, and her room aired out.

My mom purchased a bike for me, and I can't tell you the freedom I feel when I ride. Today I rod 13km. It was amazing. I need to add some bits to the bike (bell, rack on the back). This week I should be getting the Chariot, which means Addy will be able to come with me!

Now today was BC's 150 birthday, and Penny and I went down to the Legislature to listen to our PM talk and open the ceremonies. Alot of blah blah, but the best part was the snowbirds. They were amazing. I took some really amazing photos, they flew right over us. I had goose bumps just watching them.

Beat the heat

Wow summer is here! I wish I could be working with clay, but it's just to warm to even touch the stuff. I have miniature donuts that require icing!!! On that note I finally tried my vibrating tumbler. After reading up on it, I decided I would try plastic pellets, and you know it seems to be working. I'm really happy with how the beads are turning out.

Small Break

So I have decided to take a small break from Working with clay, to organize my work area, and as most of you know there is ALOT of work to do!!!! You just never know when you might need that ball of rubber bands, or that inch long piece of twine!!!!

On that note, I have taken (surprise surprise) more pics of Addy. The camera just loves her!
Anyways to see the pics click here

Enjoying the nice weather, and putting my feet up, happy trails to all

THANK YOU DAVID LEVI SALON

I just want to give a HUGE thank you to the David Levi Hair Salon (www.davidlevi.ca) for donating the glass bottles that we used to create this collection of Bottles of Hope.
For a closer look click here:

These bottles will be given to cancer survivors and patients at the annual Relay for Life in Nanimo BC. Each bottle contains a message of hope.
Thank you to Vanessa, my mom (Sandy) my sister (Deirdre) for helping create these masterpieces!

Also if you would like to see the other bottles that were created click here

Sunny day

So I finally picked up some sunglasses for Addy.. TOOOO CUTE!
I hope everyone is having a great long weekend. I finally let loose, and had a few drinks yesterday. Strongbow was my liquid of choice. Spent it with a good group of friends. It was something that was well needed, and I feel refreshed.
I also changed my apperance and cut my hair... and cut I did. Picture will soon follow!
No clay as of just yet, but perhaps later on in the day, I finally recieved my copy of "Creating Lifelike figures in Polymer clay" by Katherine Dewey, and just dying to try some techniques. I'm also still working hard on making clay bottles! Time time where are you...

On a roll

And here is a latest pic of Addy and me at the Petting Zoo in Beacon hill park.. Can you believe she is 8 months old!

So I have been creating BOH and have been using it as a practice experience. I created a nymph. I thought it was perfect for the weather we're having here in Victoria.

moving forward

Well I haven't written in over a month, and it's been a crazy few weeks. My father passed away, and it's been a difficult time for me. But i am finding healing by creating bottles of hope. My mom, sister and I have been working on creating bottles for cancer survivors for the Relay for Life that will be happening in Nanimo in June. Here is my latest creation.

Monkey Baby

Addy's Nana Penny bought her a monkey outfit when she was in Vegas, and well all I can say is SOOOOO CUTE.

Had to share!

Octopus - Bottle of Victory

Here is my other bottle, do you see a sea theme happening with my bottles!! Alot of fun to do!

Mermaid - Bottle of Victory

Here she is, as promised. I'm really happy the way she turned out. I didn't know what to expect when I started working on her, but I am just thrilled with the outcome.





I am really enjoying working with clay again, I felt like I lost something when my depression hit, I just couldn't enjoy the little things in life. But my daughter has helped me see a new purpose.

Bottle of Victory

Well I finally got off the couch and had a burst on inspiration. I created my first Bottle of Victory. I was inspired by the books I purchased from Christi Friesen. I love the simplicity and her humour of her books.
So I plan on making a couple more 'sea themed' bottles.
I really enjoyed making this bottle, it was such a creative release, something I needed to do. I hope this is a beginning for me.

Locker Babies

). Now if these pictures don't make you smile, then I don't know what will!!!


Today was another first for Adele, we went to the pool! We went with my friend Kelsea and her twin boys!

Adele loved swimming, it was so much fun. I was a little worried that she might freak out, but she looked around and kicked her legs and splashed me to her little hearts content!

The above picture is of the twins and Adele in the change room. We didn't have anyplace to put them so into the locker they went!

I am looking forward to taking her swimming again, we will be taking swimming lessons starting April 4th. So excited, this is such a wonderful journey for her, and I love the fact that I am there sharing it with her. I just can't imagine my life without her. She makes me laugh, even when she is crying (just not at 3am thou). Now if these pictures don't make you smile, then I don't know what will!!!

Sojourn 2008 and my sister

Our first Van Isle Retreat was a HUGE success, and it was sooo much fun. It was something that I personally needed. I met so many wonderful people, and learnt so much from the experince. The best part thou was that my sister and I had fun together, and we both agree that we can go on a vacation together!

But out of all of this, how I missed my little girl. I was a little shocked and surprised at how much I missed her.

The above picture is from our bead swap. I love this idea and think it's such a great idea, and momento of wonderful memories had by all.

Tired but excited, I am going to call it a night, more pictures soon.

Running

Lately I have been dealing with alot on my shoulders. I have pick up running again, and wow what a difference losing 40lb can be. Before losing all the weight, I was always at the back of the pack, and i mean WAAYYYY back. I almost dread coming to the running group, but now it's a different story.

The past couple of days I have been dealing with a lot of build up energy, and tonight's run was a good way to release that built up energy. It felt so good, first to get it out of my system and second, to not think about what is going on around me for 20 minutes.

God I hope my knee does blow out on me!!!!

Alone

Well the time has come, and I am now alone. I'm exhausted. Addy and I had a full day. Bathtime went alot better then I expected. How she loves to splash and laugh. I can see her loving the water. I am looking forward to registering her at the Commonwealth in the Starfish program.
She is changing everyday. She watches the world around her. It makes you wonder what she sees.

Myself, the medication is helping. Tonight it will be a little ruff as I will have the intercom on her so I can hear her. My normal bed time meds usually knock me out, so I will avoid taking it tonight. At least until I have moved her crib and all into my room.

The house feels empty.

Clay Time

My table is up (THANKS TO WANDA) . What project do I do first. A vase, a bead, a tile, what oh what can I do!!!

The other day I was visiting Gera Scott Chandler (http://www.gerascottchandler.com/), and every time I walk threw her studio I feel so inspired, she is such an amazing artist. I have her work all over the house. Her Blog is filled with inspiration.
Another artist is Wanda who also inspires me. I love her new teapot (http://www.wandadesigns.blogspot.com/).
So much talent between these two women... getting excited now, need to get the rest of my stuff of the garage so I can work....

Finding acceptance

Moving on in my life it seems hard to believe that in 6 months everything that I believed in has changed. I am on medication now, and it's started to keep me grounded and focused on my task at hand which is to get better to be able to take care of my daughter.
I have been forced into a situation that was so unexpected, but now I am learning to grieve and deal with it head on. I did not want to believe that this was really happening to me. But I am taking control of my life again, learning all over to who I am, and that it's ok to be scared and happy. I can do this, I have to keep telling myself. It's time I do things for myself. I have to heal my open wounds before I can be the best mom possible for Adele. She deserves the best. So I am taking the steps needed. I have created a circle of support. With friends, family, doctors, public health nurse, groups, and GOOD meds. I can get threw this. I will prevail. I will win this battle.

Clean bill of health

Today was Addy's 4 month check-up, and she passed with flying colors. She is now 14 lb 08 ounces and is 63 cm long. First of all SHE'S 4 MONTHS OLD, wow where did the time go. She is growing so fast, it's so unbelievable. We have learned that this little one has a TEMPER. WOW.

She is a great little baby, couldn't have asked for a better littler girl. She loves her bath every night, she smiles all the time, and she has the cutest laugh! I know I am biased. But she really does. And one more thing, can this girl FILL a diaper!

Post Pardum Depression

It's once again been awhile since I have visited this place. Many things keep happening.
It's a new year, and for once I do not know where my life is going to lead.
I'm in a dark place. I have been diagnosed with post pardum depression. With everything that has been happening over the past few months, it has finally taken it's toll on me, and I can no longer keep my happy mask on.
I am getting the help I need, but it's not a quick fix. Nothing in my life right now is a quick fix.
It's hard to wake up in the morning, it's hard to eat, hard to sleep, and it's hard to even enjoy the laughter of my daughter.
Depression is such a horrible place to be. I just want to cover myself up in a hole and not come out. Your insides are screaming and raging in you, and all I can do is try and keep myself together, and not fall. But how I would like to fall, and just stop all this pain, to not feel everything that I am going threw!